Of course, a large chunk of Neil Lennon news came last year September when, following an Old Firm derby match, Coach Lennon was attacked by two Rangers supporters outside of pub, Jinty McGuinty’s Bar, in Glasgow’s west end. The immediate reaction was for Lennon’s condition and the punishment for these two examples of sectarian scum. Once we found out Lennon was going to be fine, the incident for most part just annoyed us Celtic fans, shaking up the vitriol in an already vitriolic rivalry.

The two perpetrators have now been released, having only served a quarter of their two-year sentence. Thug #1, Jeffrey Carrigan, was released in July, but gets to wear an electronic criminal tag. Thug #2, David Whitelaw, was released last month. The latter assailant/criminal trash has no electronic tag but still such an embarrassment to our league to be fair warning for Coach Lennon and all the Hoops’ faithful.

Hooliganism, racism, and sectarianism have no place in football, before, during or after a match. All those who continue to promote sectarianism and any violence at its behest should be made examples.

A Firth, for those unfamiliar with loose Gaelic, is a waterway term, basically an inlet. Its cognate is the Scandinavian fjord. But don’t get this confused with the ever-popular loch (e.g., Loch Ness, of course); lochs (not loches) are usually sea- and melted glacier- water closed off by land from the North Sea ocean water that surrounds the majority of Scotland. Of course, you could use sea-loch to describe these geographical occurrences, but we here at the Celtic Offside Report prefer firth.

We are Celtic. This is the Celtic Offside Report. And we like firths.

Over-the-top montage on the triumph and pain Celtic has experienced this year’s UEFA Champions League run. Over the top, indeed.

We are Celtic. This is the Celtic Offside Report.

“Celtic are a very physical team. They play at high rhythm,” said Ancelotti. Just like I said.

Of specific Bhoys, Milano gave us: “I think Vennegoor of Hesselink is one of their best players. Last season he played against us when he was at PSV.” Apparently he’s been doing some reading too. JVH has been hot, scoring more goals than in the last five matches than you can count on one hand (that’s seven, for y’all counting at home and on two hands).

Of Shunsuke Nakamura, “He is a talented player, although he still has to find regularity (consistency),” No, the Japanese international is pure class, with an 18 month tour of Italian football under his belt to boot.

So, just to bring the boss of Milan up to speed:

We are Celtic Pure Intimidation. This is the Celtic Offside Report.

We are Celtic. This is the Celtic Offside Report. We never walk alone.

With all the shenanigans that accompanies Italian soccer – most notable and recent, the raucous and riotous nonsense that ensued following the Sicilian derby of Catania and Palermo – it’s no wonder many are on edge to find out where the away leg of Celtic v Milan will be played.

Now, most publications are stating that Milan will host Celtic and a crowd full in San Siro, but the columnists in the UK, including Barry Broadfoot – The Herald’s chief football writer – think the situation in Sicily should have no bearing on the Celtic’s Champions League draw, especially a most punitive one.

“Scotland’s vested interest in the punishment meted out by whichever authority claims jurisdiction has dominated the football agenda for the past week. Why Celtic and AC Milan, Scotland and the Azzurri, should be punished for an incident in Sicily underlines incompetence levels from Rome to Geneva.”

Put the gun down, Il Diavolo. Dad just wants to see his son play in the hoops – shiny black and green hoops. Don’t we all.

We are held hostage Celtic. This is the Celtic Offside Report.

But a fantastic column in The Times today has highlighted the ongoing saga of Gordon Strachan and his striker selections. Jan Vennegoor of Hesselink in his last three matches has scored a total of five goals, a hat-trick in Celtic’s most recent defeat of St Mirren. JVH this last match was paired with Scotland’s own Craig Beattie, who assisted in fourth Celtic goal of the day, JVH’s hat-trick third. Beattie played in place of Maciej Zurawski, who scored twice in a SFA Cup crushing of Dumberton January sixth. Against St Mirren, Beattie was subbed out by Kenny Miller, who came on to score Hoops’ final goal of the day, a ricochet of Saints’ keeper Chris Smith that Miller cleaned up for the Celtic fifth of the day.

This column highlights the greater success of the Dutchman of Hesselink, compared to the relative lack of goal-scoring success of Miller and Zurawski. Now, Zurawski got his share of goals when JVH was sidelined to injury. In fact his curriculum vitae at Celtic since 2005 has produced twenty-two goals in forty-seven appearances – almost a goal every other match. Kenny Miller, after being signed in September last year, failed to score in his first nine outings, waiting to net his first against his former employer and Old Firm rival Rangers. Miller has only produced four goals in twenty-four appearences, two against Portugal’s Benfica in the home Champions League win. Beattie, since 2003 has scored eleven goals on forty appearences, but only one this season, again capitalizing as host to St Mirren back in September.

Jan Vennegoor of Hesselink is the obvious scorer of goals right now. Strachan thinks Beattie pairs best with him up top. Magic can score on his own, but with less consistency, and then there’s Kenny Miller. Oh, and then there’s Aiden McGeady, who also scored against Saints in the 5-1 route. Obviously, the talent and potential for attacker goals is there, and with many of the Bhoys now back to form from injuries, Gordon Strachan will have his hands full to find the perfect combination of forwards. All this, preferably before the February 20 match at home with Milan to kick off the Champions League Round of Sixteen, where Celtic will need to produce in order to keep any hopes for more UEFA success.

We are Celtic. This is the Celtic Offside Report.

The 19 year old Northern Ireland talent, playing for Burnley FC in the Championship League, though offered the handsome sum of £500,000, has denied Celtic of his services. The Burnley boss Steve Cotterill has dismissed the large fee as outlandish and warns Strachan and Parkhead to not return with a second offer: “He’s not for sell.”

Lafferty has recorded 4 club goals on 12 league starts and 11 substitutions, and has already come on for Northern Ireland for 7 international caps.

The Burnley boys aren’t budging neither. They really want the lad to stay, so that he can “be a Burnley great and follow in the footsteps of other Northern Ireland players at Burnley such as Jimmy McIlroy, Willie Irvine and Billy Hamilton.”

“They have nurtured him, protected him and generally looked after him. He’s a lot to thank the people at Burnley.”

Apparently not enough, however. As reported in The Scotsman, The little bastard’s grown up a fan of Rangers. The lad is ‘honored’ with the lure of Celtic, but feels that his agent and coach are saying and doing the right thing by keeping him at Turf Moor. Suit yourself, kiddo. Sounds like Burnley’s still got work to do to get the ‘Gers out of him.

We are Celtic. This is the Celtic Offside Report.

So the quotable Celtic this week has been Czech international Jiri Jarosik, whose most recent goal at 81 put Celtic a goal ahead of home Hearts, and Celtic 17 points clear of second place Rangers, 20 points clear of third place Aberdeen.

Apparently, the man can do know wrong. 4 goals in 16 appearance this season. But say no wrong… hell, what hasn’t he said?

In a recent interview to Czech Daily Sport, Jarosik’s national sporting press:

“I wish [Rangers] could make the next season more dramatic…There are still 15 games to be played, but if we lose this advantage and do not win the title, we may all quit football.”

I’m sure some of it gets lost in translation.

We are Celtic. This is the Celtic Offside Report.

Steven Pressley.

Yep, the former Hearts’ captain returns to Tynecastle to captain Hoops, i.e., the other side. While it hade been rumored during the week, by the Daily Record and others, I was a bit skeptical, but don’t count me as a nay-sayer. I think it was smart to have the seasoned defender as the captain; I personally love captain defenders, like John Terry of Chelsea and Fabio Cannavaro of Italy. At the same time, giving Elvis the armband for his first return match against his old team may have displayed a little bit of the gamesmanship that we’ve all grown to love in Gordy.

We are Celtic. This is the Celtic Offside Report.